True love, South Korean style: UPDATE

So, in case it wasn't apparent from Part 1 (Part 1) I am totally, totally, totally obsessed with love matchers. I beat my spotting record on Sunday, taking snaps of 6 loved up 6 in 20 minutes. That is one spot every three and a half minutes!!! I have included below a selection of the goodness that is currently on the streets of Seoul (more on Instagram). 

The winning couple so far!!!

The monsoon season has now officially arrived in Korea and I expect that this will bring new challenges to couples who favour matching footwear - sneakers are not really the go in pouring rain. I have already spotted matching Birkenstock sandals (see below) and am now desperately seeking matching gumboots, preferably hot pink!!!!

As a result of the last few weeks of same same spotting, I have some additional questions to add to those raised in Part 1 (now I just need to actually ask these questions to the loved up Koreans on the street). 

1. What if you go out as part of a group yet the guy you are with chooses not to dress the same as you but another guy in the group, who is clearly not your boyfriend (in fact you appear to not even like him) is dressed the same as you? What do you do?

Not the best photo but from my observation, red t-shirt girl was clearly with green t-shirt boy. Awkward?

2. What if when you are out with your matching friend you have a massive fight which could even be a total break-up with one half abandoning the other mid-outing? walks off? Should you remove your love match outfit (in this case it was the entire outfit) on the spot or do you have a defined amount of time in which to retreat? (Note to loved up Koreans - please stick together if in love match apparel as it makes it really difficult for me to discreetly take a photo).   

Are they together?

getting closer...

Finally, hand on shoulder!

3. Parent/child scenario: is it the parent choosing the same shoes as child or child choosing the same shoes as the parent?  What if the whole family decides to dress the same? I have no picture for this but I have heard about it. 

4. Is there a certain significance to an older couple participating in love match?  Are they recently dating, long time married or just been shopping together? 

Interestingly, I believe I saw a western couple partaking in this phenomenon the other day. Maybe love match, like k-pop, is becoming totally cool outside of Korea. To test the theory that love match is completely expected and not at all weird, I am working on convincing Dutch friends (married couple also with three children) that they should leave the house in matching gear (which will most likely be orange) and see if they receive any undue attention. I say no - it will be perfectly acceptable to all and no-one will even blink!

Soul to Seoul: keep the soles of love coming people!

Buddha's birthday and rave parties

Despite my addiction to colourful sneakers ( see True Love South Korean style Part 1) I never really embraced the rave scene back in Melbourne in the late 1990s. The big, noisy parties that started way too late didn't hold enormous appeal to me and my totally suburban roots at the time but, now in my mid 30s with three children, I feel that it may be time to change all that. See, here in Seoul form mid-April to mid-May it is the lead up to and actual day of Buddha's birthday and the celebrations totally rock. How does Buddha's birthday link with raves you ask? Quite a bit actually. Firstly, it's the drumming. Mesmerising, heart pumping, body shaking drumming that rocks you to your core much like the rhythmic beats of the rave. Then there are the thousands upon thousands of paper lanterns (all handmade, which take a ridiculously long time and for the lotus lanterns require infinite patience to twirl and stick) replacing the ubiquitous neon glow sticks of the rave as symbols of joviality (I could be wrong here as to what the glow sticks are exactly meant to represent. The lanterns represent wisdom - they bring light to the world). Finally, it is the vibe people. In the weeks leading up to Buddha's birthday, particularly during the lantern festival the week before and the actual day, Seoul is one happy place! You easily forget that you are in a city of 20 million other people all in a hurry to get somewhere. Seoul's mantra of "ppali, ppali" (translation: "quickly, quickly") seems to slow down, if ever so fleetingly, and you are happy to just be - how very Buddha indeed.

The lights of the Daeungjeon, the largest temple building in Seoul

Two highlights of this year's birthday celebrations:

1. Aerobics Buddha style - the warm up act for the lantern parade held the week before Buddha's birthday. The lantern parade goes for almost three hours and is filled with thousands and thousands of smiling faces who walk a 3 kilometre stretch of road dressed in costumes and holding lanterns of all kinds of shapes, sizes and colours. Before the parade begins, a Buddha aerobics group entertained us with an amazing display of part cheerleader and part gymnast moves and, of course, matching enthusiasm.

Go Buddha aerobics man go! 

2. The white dogs. If you are able to remain sedentary by the end of this tribalistic, animalistic performance then you are most likely dead. Each white dog (there are two of them) consists of two impressively fit men who, to the increasingly frantic beats of the the pom-pom people, make their dogs jump over each other, play fight, rear up on their hind legs and they even manage to roll with each other  in a dog embrace. It is really quite amazing. Watching the white dogs accompanied by the pom pom head drumming and all my husband/mother/new city frustrations were successfully beaten out (at least for the remainder of that particular night). If raves are this good then I want in! Looking forward to next year already! 

Soul to Seoul - the path to enlightenment for this soul is all about the drum beat. 

The white dogs being followed by the white pom pom people

The multi-coloured pom pom people

Nude and public: they don't belong together

I have three kids who are totally fine with being nude on any occasion. In fact, it doesn't even have to be an occasion for them to be nude. It is just a normal state of being! It may have something to do with growing up in the Solomon Islands where clothes were really an option (when at home anyway) thanks to the heat and the fact they spent their days just going in and out of the pool. I, however, have never really embraced the public nude thing. In fact I am totally convinced that "nude" and "public" do not belong together except perhaps in a hospital when you are forced to be nude as you have to give birth. No matter how many Korean Baths I visit during this adventure I doubt I will ever change my mind! 

My recent public naked adventure (yes, there have been a few but mostly they have been complete accidents) began innocently enough. After a few months in Seoul and looking at the view of the masses of concrete and grey from outside our window, we decided it was time to get back to nature (pun so not intended) for a mini-break. We picked the destination, Seoraksan National Park, booked the hotel, packed our bags and off we went, anticipating a couple of relaxing days (whatever that may mean when travelling with little ones) in the mountains. 

Close to Seoraksan is the Osaek Mineral Water Springs and several hotels in the area use the Springs as the water source for their public baths. We had decided that a fun, family activity would be an afternoon visit to one such establishment, described by the Lonely Planet as a "mountain chalet-inspired complex...[that] has lovely...bath areas." Note the clear omission of nakedness in this summary. 

At first, all seemed perfectly normal in the hotel's change-room, with women of all ages, including smaller children, taking their clothes off. The kids and I did the same and, as we usually do, proceeded to put on our bathing suits. Things then got a little more interesting. I heard a finger wagging at me (amazing how you can hear this but I swear you can, especially when it is an adjuma doing the wagging) and I caught the eye of the change room monitor. She pointed at my bathing suit and shook her head (along with her finger). My bathing suit is super ugly (plain blue high cut one piece designed with practicality in mind. It is also over six years old and really does not do much to flatter the body attempting to squeeze into it) so my first thought was that perhaps she had taken offence to its blandness but it soon became apparent that the bathing suit was not the problem. As I looked around, I became all too aware that there was a lot taking off going on but no corresponding action of putting on. The naked women were remaining naked. I fearfully unfolded the towel I had been handed. To even call it a towel would be an insult to towels. This piece of towel was more like a child's face washer and it was not going to hide anything even if I tried inconspicuously to hold it across me. Clearly I had a choice: politely decline at this point and walk out with three disappointed kids (who, of course, are totally fine with the naked thing) or embrace my female form in all its glory and enter the baths. I closed my eyes for a moment in resignation for the humiliation that was soon to come. Deep breath in and the naked path we took. 

People, the scene facing my small tribe when we opened the change room doors will never leave me. I had entered some alternate reality where I was taking part in a Cleopatra-esque era movie Korean style. There were more than ten big (think typical Aussie backyard pool big) rectangle baths spread out before us. There were hot baths, hotter baths and even hotter baths to choose from (temperature readings at the top told you what to expect) along with a walking bath, a mud bath, a cold bath and the outside bath (where, as we discovered, there was no where to hide thanks to the water clarity). Along one side of the enormous cavern were rows and rows of mirrored benches where groups of women sat on small stools facing the mirrors and vigorously scrubbed each other using special gloves and brushes. All totally naked. Despite all the activity - women walking from bath to bath, from bath to scrubbing area and back to bath - there was an unbelievable sense of calm that exuded from all. One might even say it was somewhat liberating and strangely comforting all at once. I would like to report that I soon got used to being this naked but I did not. Oh no, not at all.   

In no particular order, this is what was going through my mind as I joined the hundreds of other naked women in the bath: 

• What if an incident should happen here inside the baths to one of the elderly adjumas in the bath with me (and there were quite a few)? CPR would best be performed not naked I assume?  
• What if the baths suddenly caught fire and you were literally caught with your pants down as the fire brigade turned up? For my brother, this would not even be an issue but if you are not my brother I will assume that you would feel a little awkward.  
• What if a major story was breaking right outside the hotel and, with no warning, CNN burst into the baths and, with camera in hand, thrusts a microphone in your face to ask for your reaction? Remember I am naked. Well, as we know, the news waits for no-one: by the time I had clothed myself, CNN would have moved on to someone else to ask for their views and my one shot at journalistic fame would have to be passed up thanks to the need to cover up first.
• Still on the sudden escape theme, being in a state of Korean bath zen with freshly scrubbed skin from your friend/mother/sister/daughter (who have all happily spent a naked afternoon together) would not help me become all Bruce Willis like should the moment eventuate. 
• And finally, what if this was just some cruel joke and the women were actually all completely dressed but, to my eye, I was convinced they were all naked (a reverse Emperor's New Clothes situation)? The shame, the shame.  

Taking all of these possible, maybe not highly likely but possible nevertheless, scenarios is into consideration, I failed miserably to enjoy the public naked Korean Bath experience. My 3 children later, stretch mark ridden body and/or other western no nude inhibitions, had absolutely nothing to do with it at all!

Seoul to Seoul: complete baring of the soul is not required.  

Some pictures of the area below.

Seoraksan National Park

Woljeong-sa Temple, located in Odaesan National Park

K-POP wannabe gone wrong

This is a (spruced up) picture of the gym in the hotel where we are currently staying. Just your usual treadmill affair with a few exercise bikes, a rower and some weights at the back. Nothing overly exciting but it does the job.

The gym is located on Level 2 of the hotel, a very central location that is also home to the morning breakfast buffet, the pool, spa and sauna and the kids playroom. This means a lot of people, in fact, most of the hotel guests, come and go from just outside the gym. 

There is no speaker system for the gym. Rather, users bring their own earphones and either use their "i" device or plug into the TV screens for one of many k-pop channels so they control the volume at which they listen (vital fact). 
Aside from the extremely buff personal trainer (is there any other type?) who seems to live in the gym, the regular gym users consist of:

• Fit Japanese dude who looks fifty but i suspect he is actually 70. His body is a temple and his workouts are methodical.
• Man who was once with wife but she has since disappeared and he has now, very proudly, grown a dark brown moustache to complement his growing muscle mass and greying, thinning hair.
• Angry middle aged woman who locks her kids upstairs while she somewhat maniacally works out her various frustrations on the bike.
• Various mining engineers who have left family behind in home country while they do what they need to do (for the good of the family). 
• And then there is me (who perhaps could be mistaken for person described in dot point 3 but is not).

You would be right in assuming that this gym, like most hotel gyms, is not the appropriate place for one to practice k-pop renditions, particularly if person practising is quite well known for not being able to sing (tone deaf is too generous a term in this respect).  So, how did I feel when a fellow hotel guest politely asked me one morning if I was aware of a rumour circulating the hotel that there was some crazy Australian woman who sings loudly, very loudly, while running on the treadmill? Fellow hotel guest was way too generous in her spirited defence of me, explaining that she had attempted to exonerate me against the allegations of public singing on the grounds that: a) it would not be me and; b) that there would be no way that I would be singing One Direction or various Glee ballads. Oh, how wrong she was.

In my defence, I am struggling for running motivation. Seoul was too cold for too long and now it is too hot. In any event, outside running has limited options as the traffic, chaotic as most Asian cities are, does not tend to stay purely on the roads (don't get me started on the buses - they are a law unto themselves). And then there is the yellow dust phenomenon that comes this way every year from China making for great headaches and not so great running air. But is there really any excuse for an unfit 35 year old on a treadmill in a public gym with earphones in to belt out the following lyrics (in true Glee style, this is a mashed up version of several song lyrics)?

"I know we've only met but let's pretend it's love. My lover, he's waiting for me just across the road. I know I gave it to you months ago so let's set the world on fire. We can burn brighter than the sun. I'm bullet proof. Let's go crazy, crazy, crazy till we see the sun. Just got to ignite the light and let it shine cause baby you're a firework and we will never be anything but dirty little freaks." 

Have I mentioned yet that I cannot sing? I can't. Not at all. My own two year old pleads with me in the car to stop singing as it hurts her ears. Not only that but I never know the words. I might know one or two words of the chorus (sometimes a whole line on a particularly good day) but usually there is a lot of "yeah yeah yeah" going on along with some serious mumbling. So what was I thinking when I began to sing outside of my head (where, btw, I am totally awesome)? I don't know but now that I have started I'm not sure I know how to stop! Seriously, I am running some really good times thanks to my own words of encouragement via song and the joy that I am getting from the singing/running might just possibly outweigh the embarrassment! 

Kindly fellow hotel guest (who took it well when my blushed face gave the game away) did take it upon herself to check with the bemused yet concerned hotel guests as to what they would like to happen with my cat screeching impersonations. The somewhat surprising conclusion is that they would like me to continue as it provides much needed entertainment for all. Maybe I might (finally) be discovered. I am in the land of K-POP after all! 

Soul to Seoul - slightly embarrassed and perhaps even a little soulful but will continue.

True love, South Korean style: Part 1

I have always had a slight obsession with sneakers. Starting with a fluorescent pink and blue pair of Skechers back in 1999, I have moved through various colours, styles and brands. I remember days spent with green and yellow Asics on my feet, bright blue Nikes on the dance floor of some dodgy afternoon nightclub and red and white Adidas that took me through my London backpacking days. The current pair are purple New Balance (I have no brand loyalty) with a bright lime green trim. Hot. Do I like them enough however that I would want husband to also own a pair (or do I like my husband enough that I would also like him to own the very same pair)? That would be a pretty definite no (not so sure whether it is more a no to the first question or the second but it is a no nevertheless). And, once again, it is this response (leaving aside for the moment the fact that I am not comfortable with full frontal nudity in public baths, that I believe my old, grey tracksuit pants are an acceptable form of clothing outside of the home and that I do not need kim chi with every meal) that very clearly highlights I am not South Korean because, as far as I can tell, true love South Korean style is all about the matching.

It seems that there are three levels to the so called "love match" phenomenon.

1. Matching sneaker model but not colour

This trend does not warrant a photo or even more discussion as these couples are clearly not really committed to each other.

2. Matching sneakers in both model AND colour

This is by far the most prolific trend on the street today. Obvious commitment to each other displayed here.

3. Matching sneakers topped off with complete matching outfit 

Now this is true love and it must surely mean that marriage/mortgage/babies, or some other significant coupledom event, is imminent.

As you can see from the snapshot of photos above (I have many, many more) I have become slightly obsessed with love matching and not just for the photo opportunities it presents. I feel compelled to understand the rather significant relationship dilemmas that love match brings up. (I am making the assumption here that the love came before the sneaker/outfit choice and not the other way around, i.e., person in red tracksuit did not walk down the street and find another person in red tracksuit and then they fell in love, but I am prepared to be proven wrong on this front.)

I have broken up the issues that I feel love match poses into three categories  of relationship dilemmas that a couple would have to face should they choose to enter into this loved up state of sameness.

Relationship dilemma no. 1: The decision on timing
Who decides that the couple is "love match" ready?  Is there a pre-determined time in every couple's relationship where love match is expected to take place and this graduation to sameness is a signal to the world that deeper commitments will shortly follow? (This raises a related relationship dilemmas: how long should you hang around in a relationship waiting for the love match decision?) Is the decision to enter love match bliss even a choice made by one or both of the couple. Perhaps one day they  suddenly find themselves in a sneaker shop where they simultaneously purchase the same shoe? Or perhaps same sneakers are thrust upon them by a well-intentioned adjuma (Korean for middle-aged woman). 

Relationship dilemma no. 2: The responsibility for choice
Assuming that there is a right relationship time for love match to occur and that moment has come, who in the couple is responsible for choice of said sneaker and/or outfit? In my own world of coupledom bliss, husband does not particularly care for my purple/lime green sneakers and I can't say that I am overly keen to wear his black with orange stripe Nikes. So what would happen in this instance if we were loved up Koreans? Would (or should) we break up over a sneaker style disagreement? 

Relationship dilemma no. 3: The ownership of the sneaker/outfit
Say that we did agree on the sneaker and/or outfit choice and it works for a time, surely there comes a day when one half decides for no particular reason that the sneaker is no longer working for them. What would this mean for the couple and their love? What about the reverse: where you continue to love the sneakers but no longer the partner? Could you continue to wear the sneakers if you break up? Could you buy out your other half so your next partner could inherit the sneakers? Or must the sneakers be forever destined for the cardboard box of relationship memories? 

No answers yet...
And the answers to the above questions are? I have no idea, but because I am more than a little intrigued (some might say perhaps even a little bored) I have decided to make understanding the love match phenomenon my mission in South Korea. Stay tuned for Part 2, the results of some impromptu encounters with love matchers where I seek answers to the relationship dilemmas raised above.  

Soul to Seoul - all about the matching soles!